Thursday, July 30, 2009

Γιούρκας - Μινχάουζεν - Σεϊταρίδης


Το ελληνικό ποδόσφαιρο έχει τον δικό του Βαρόνο Μινχάουζεν, και αυτός δεν είναι άλλος από τον Γιούρκα Σεϊταρίδη..
Διαβάστε τι δήλωσε ο μικρός θεούλης στο περιοδικό maxim:
"Έπιασα 358 km/h γυρνώντας από τη Θεσσαλονίκη πριν από μερικές εβδομάδες... ...Ξεκίνησε για πλάκα, όταν ένας τύπος με προσπέρασε με τη μηχανή του κάνοντας σούζα, ενώ πήγαινα με 265 χιλιόμετρα! Εκεί άρχισε μια άτυπη ‘κόντρα’, που με έκανε να ξεχαστώ"

Κάτι τέτοια έλεγε ένας συμμαθητής μου στο σχολείο, που ισχυρίζονταν ότι είχε προσπεράσει porsche με το στρογγυλοφάναρο παπάκι του...
Βεβαίως, δεν γνωρίζω αν μια φεράρι είναι σε θέση να πιάσει 358 χλμ/ώρα, αλλά φαντάζει πραγματικά κωμική η σκηνή όπου μια μηχανή κάνει σούζα με (τουλάχιστον) 270 χλμ/ώρα και προσπερνάει την φεράρι του Γιούρκα Σεϊταρίδη, ενώ εκείνος πίνει αμέριμνος το φραπέ του και ακούει τις τελευταίες μεγάλες επιτυχίες του Αντώνη Ρέμου.

ακολουθεί περιγραφή

...θυμωμένο, το ταχύτατο δεξί μπακ, αφήνει το φραπέ στην ειδική θήκη που κατασκεύασαν κατόπιν παραγγελίας του, οι τεχνικοί της Φεράρι, τοποθετεί στο CD player τις "τσούλες" της Βίσση (που είναι τραγούδι με καλύτερο ρυθμό για υψηλές ταχύτητες) και αρχίζει να πατάει θυμωμένος το γκάζι. Ο μηχανόβιος αντιλαμβάνεται την "άτυπη κόντρα" που έχει ξεκινήσει, και γκαζώνει και εκείνος, χωρίς φυσικά να πάψει να κάνει σούζα.

Τα κοντέρ των δυο οχημάτων κοντεύουν να σπάσουν και ο Γιούρκας έχει ξεχάσει γιατί ξεκίνησε όλο αυτό.. "μπορείς απόψε να βγεις, με όλες τις τσούλες της γης" ακούει από το στόμα της "απόλυτης" και το μυαλό του ταξιδεύει σε μακρινούς γαλαξίες. Η κόκκινη φεράρι, μαρσάρει αγριεμένη μέσα από νεφελώματα και ντριπλάρει λευκούς νάνους, όπως κάποτε εκείνος ντριπλάριζε γεμάτος χάρη τους αντιπάλους του. Και το πόδι του, πατάει ακόμα πιο δυνατά το γκάζι.

Κάπου εκεί, τελειώνει το τραγούδι, τελειώνει και το παραλήρημα.
Το κοντέρ γράφει 358 και κρύος ιδρώτας λούζει τον Γιούρκα.
Σιγά σιγά κόβει ταχύτητα.. Ο Μηχανόβιος δεν φαίνεται πουθενά. Ούτε μπρος, ούτε πίσω. Μάλλον θα σκοτώθηκε.
Το κινητό του χτυπάει. Είναι ο πρόεδρος της ΑΕΚ.
"Γιούρκα παιδί μου, τι κάνεις; Σε σκεφτόμουν χθες βράδυ. Είχα αγωνία για το μέλλον σου. Όταν αποφασίσεις για την ομάδα στην οποία θα συνεχίσεις την καριέρα σου, μην παραλείψεις να με ενημερώσεις!"
"ΟΚ" απάντησε κοφτά ο Γιούρκας, με φωνή που θύμιζε λαιμητόμο, και έκλεισε το κινητό.
"Αυτοί οι θαυμαστές δεν σε αφήνουν ποτέ ήσυχο" σκέφτηκε και έβαλε να ακούσει Πέγκυ Ζήνα

16 κουτουράδες:

John "the Kimura" Pastas said...

Vasika ton eixe kai synenteuksh sto EVO auto to mhna.

Kai ton rwtane ti autokinhta exeis auto ot kairo. Kai apantaei:

Mia Lamborghini Murcielago LP640 Vercace edition (me dermata versace sto saloni).

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kai mia Ferrari 430 Monza.


Synolo auta einai gyrw sto 1.1 ekat. EURO.

Poio einai to Top Speed pou exeis piasei? Kai apantaei:

"Sto ekswteriko 300xlm/wra. Sthn Ellada poly ligotera afou den exoume dromous"

Ara leei psemata o karias. Mallon prospathouse na entypwsiasei ta gkomenakia sto Maxim

George said...

Στην Μονακο έπρεπε να παιζει αυτός. Σε καμια αλλη ομάδα στην ευρωπη!! Να παρκαρει την Φεραρι μπροστα στο cafe de Paris και να αράζει...

mujahedin said...

είναι ένας πραγματικός μπον βιβέρ!

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